I love marriage. Truly, I am evidence that “it is not good for man to be alone.” As I sit down tonight to write, I am just minutes from my 10th wedding anniversary. In light of all that happened today (the shootings), there seems to be a clarity of what holds real value. There also seems to be renewed clarity of what holds little or NO value in this life. Total Document Solutions Xerox was the place I worked when I was a senior in college at the University of Arkansas. Tim Stanley was the kind of CEO who hung power quotes on his bathroom at the workplace to keep motivation levels high. I remember a white 8.5 x 11 laminated card stock sheet hanging above the community restroom that said: “On their death-bed, nobody ever says: ‘If I could just spend one more hour at work.'” Funny what you remember in times like these. With this in mind, I’d like to share with you a simple list. Here are my top ten marriage meditations from my first ten years of marriage. Feel free to add (or subtract) to the list. Enjoy.
1. QUOTE: “Marriage was designed to make us holy more than to make us happy.” (Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas)
2. KIDS: Marriage gets better with kids, not worse. (true story)
3. CONFLICT: If you’re marriage is easy, it may be boring. Pick a healthy fight. Fighting can be fun. Making up is more fun.
4. ONENESS: Stay close and constant and Oneness is inevitable. Pride separates, but humility is the key to staying together.
5. LAUGHTER: Conflict is rarely personal; but it almost always feels that way. Learn to laugh at yourself.
6. PERSONALITY: Love is still spelled T-I-M-E, but it can also be spelled G-I-F-T.
7. TRIALS: Be Brave. Be Strong. Never Give up.
8. DIFFERENCES: Sex is good. Sleep is good. God made both for our health and pleasure. We all need lots of both. Good luck!
9. PERSPECTIVE: 1 + 1 = 3 in God’s Economy. Take every opportunity to invite God into your marital decisions.
10. MONEY: Make as much as you can. Give as much as you can. Save as much as you can. LOVE THAT IS! Don’t love to live more than you live to love. Money won’t mean much 100 years from now.
70 years or bust…